March 23, 2008

Linger

I always loved that song! Ever since I first listened to it; and I loved it even more when I listened to the live version from the Pavarotti and Friends concert for the Children of Bosnia.

It was strange for all my friends to hear me say how much I loved that particular song because they would tell me things like “I don’t see you getting your heart broken over anyone, you have a careful heart and you’re too strong to be wrapped around anyone’s finger” and later, they used to say with a puzzeled tone “but you're happily married, this song does not suit you hehehe *sarcastic laugh*

For the past three years, this song used to make me ache way too much. I have verses of it written all over my notebooks, and the journal I kept, and even on word files!! It didn’t just hurt because he hurt me; it hurt because I let him hurt me. I let him wrap me around his finger, I let myself be foolish enough to believe his lame ass lies, I let him use me, and at some point, I let him change me.

This song made me angry at myself more than anyone else!! I thought I was smarter than that; smarter than to fall for a person like him. That’s what people told me all the time, and that’s what I believed; I am a smart person who wouldn’t let any one take advantage of me… again, hahahaha *ok, I actually find this funny*

This song was my worst nightmare come to life! Knowing that he wasn’t worth it, acknowledging he’s a piece of crap and yet for some reason wondering why he had to let it linger.

A few days ago, as I was driving with my sisters to or from Alexandria (I honestly don’t remember), the song played. And for the first time in the past three years, I sang along with a huge smile on my face; no sadness, no bitterness, no anger, but most of all, no linger.

It’s still a good song, too good to remind me of him.

** this was written a coupel of weeks ago, only posted today for Ran

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

ooh .. i just love this song .
one of my all time favs. along with Animal instinct .
i think those 2 songs are made for you somehow .

insomniac said...

this song is just brilliant... love its music kaman....

the animal instinct, really??!! i mean i am a big fan of cranberries in general... off the top of my head, my favs are: dreams, loud and clear, empty, daffodil lament, no need to argue... omG, i can go one forever :))

made for me, WOW that's big :) thanks anyway :))

Anonymous said...

my favs are : Promises, Animal Instinct, Linger, Salvation, New New York and Hollywood.
not mentioning Zombie of course :D

yeah.. those 2 songs describe a lot of your posts and what you are going through perfectly ... at least i thought so :S .

insomniac said...

ohh yeah promises... how could i forget this one...

zombie was too much of a cliche tho, people ruined it for me

funny how i always liked the songs i listed, and how i could relate to them with all that's been going on!!!