March 22, 2008

same song, different angle…

My cousin finally got me some of the oldies I asked him for a couple of months ago; he does not have such a bad memory afterall!!

For the first time in a number of years, I listened to Abdel Haleem’s Balash 3etab. My best friend D once forced me into listening to it shortly after a painful break up.
I remember telling her the lyrics we more than ok only I couldn’t relate and then somehow turned the whole thing into a joke and well, we were watching the song as part of the movie, and seeing Abdel Haleem singing always cracked me up. If you’re a Abdel Haleem fan, don’t ask.

I listened to the song yesterday, somehow I related. As a matter of fact, a few words just found their way right into the scars I have, causing them to somehow itch.

I was just telling a friend of mine how I related, except for how the song kept saying “ya habeeby”, he is not habeeby; he’s anything but that. My friend told me that the “ya habeeby” is what made the song brilliant, because it made the song more like an unsent letter to the figure once thought of as a loved one, not the current person who no longer was.

I found myself agreeing, because the lyrics, the way they were written; they would only make sense when they are spoken to the person I once thought he was to me. Other than that, it wouldn’t make sense if I say them to the idiot who ruined it all leaving me nothing but dismay for this person, the one he is right now, wouldn’t understand any of it. The person he is right now would mistake it for lingering feelings, and would accordingly think he has an edge that does not even exist; pathetic really!!

Listening to the song, made me realize a couple of things… it’s been a year since he left for China!! Mocha’s birthday is in two months; the whole drama has been going on for almost a year! Boy does time pass!!

It also made me realize that I still remember there were good moments, moments that hurt to remember; not because they make me feel nostalgic, but because it feels like they were wasted on the wrong person for a long time. So for what it’s worth, all the times I have cried through the past year, it wasn’t over him, it was over me and all the lost chances on his account.

This is what I have to say to the not habeeby him: if you have one ounce of anything good in you, just let me go damn it.

11 comments:

Arima said...

I like your interpretation of the song and I am glad that it has helped ou come to terms with some things to some extent. Out of interest what is it that you find so funny about Abdel Halim's singing?

insomniac said...

hahaha Arima, you'll turn Abdel Haleem's fans against me girl...

ok, it's the whole sahtan look, and well, he always gave me the impression that he was about to faint.... so whenever i see him singing or acting and remember how girls and women used to go crazy over THAT, i burst into laughter!!

to all the dedicated fans: i am sorry guys! for what it's worth though, he had a platinum voice, and some great songs :))

Arima said...

I'm sorry Insomniac but actually I am a Abdel Halim fan in hiding.
I always thought he was gorgeous but saying that I do see what you mean...as a child me and my cousins would do Abdel Halim spoofs of him and the invariable Layla, the invariably angry father, Halim's inevitable illness/ injury and the fathers inevitable softening heart...you get the picture.
We also had spoofs of the songs for example
"Ahwak...wa ana nafsi armeek min al shubak...akool chocolata ma3ak..."

insomniac said...

i knew u were a fan!!

come on, if abdel haleem was gorgeous, what would u call rushdy abaza????

and yeah, ahwak was the butt of a lot of jokes... but i luv that song nonetheless :))

Deeeeeee said...

I'm a big fan of Abdel Halim Hafez's songs. I'm not really used to looking beyond the "art", ya3ni I'm almost never interested in the painter, the singer, the photographer, or the actor! However I tend to agree to the fact that Abdel Halim beyetsha7tef too much when singing!

insomniac said...

i am not into watching singers perform, however, i believe it is important to feel the performance when listening....

sometimes the artist has charisma or charm that he/she puts into the art... i just didn't think i felt that waly about haleem! i say it again though, his voice is great and the way he sings songs (when i listen, not watch) gets me in the mood of the song immediately, i think :)

haijekov said...

man i can totally relate to this... i'll mainly comment on the end of it though ...
i know how it feels to regret doing something or trying so hard to make something special, whether it's a moment or just anything, and then realize you've been wasting all this energy on the wrong person... the only thing that comforts me is the belief that it all was done out of love ... so sue me for loving truly or for acting the way i believe is the right reaction being in love with someone... it's not your fault that the person you loved turned out to be a #^%#&@ ... it's not something wrong with you but with him

insomniac said...

exactly! this is how i found my peace with it i guess, i loved the only way i knew how to love... i just loved the wrong person.

it wasn't regret tho; it was more of "i wish it was all for someone who was worth it"... as in khosara 3aleeh ya3ne :)

it's all good... alhamdulilah :)

wishing u the best :))

hey, no abdel haleem comment :D

Ran said...

god!!! i love the song actually ur post made me download it again
its really a great one eesp. that i can totally relate to it now

(msh babke 3alek ana babkee 3aliaa YA 7ABEBE)

STILL LOVING UR BLOG SO MUCH ;)

insomniac said...

well Ran, if you can relate to this song, stay tuned for i have a great collection of songs you would relate to... songs that once made me cry, now they just make me smile...

u know what, i wrote a post a couple of weeks back i just never posted it... there you go, for you hun :))

haijekov said...

hehe ... unfortunately no abdelhalim comment here :) it's a girl's topic :P