July 15, 2008

Men, Women, and the Right to Evolve!

Weeks ago, I met with an old professor of mine and had some seriously good time. During which, we talked about everything that crossed our minds, which included the heated post I wrote about my colleague considering second marriage.

Such topics usually interest M because of his field of studies and profession; he taught me Negotiation & Dispute Resolution, Homogenous Interaction in the Workplace, and Motivation, in theory & practice, all from a business perspective. He currently teaches Inter-social/cultural Behavior or something close enough.

We talked a lot further about the matter and expanded it to other topics and I was amazed to find someone from a different culture and completely different ethnic backgrounds sharing my opinions. I contributed it to the fact that he taught me some courses of sociological genre that I definitely enjoyed, but he commented saying that not all my colleagues would have shared those opinions!

Of the things he said that I agreed with, was his opinion on genders. He said that men and women are equal as humans; that although their different sexual nature affects their gender roles, it should not make a difference on their rights as humans. Nonetheless, their gender roles are different and that each has their own package of privileges and drawbacks, all the reasons why gender roles change with time as the social perceptions of each change and evolve.

When I mentioned that somewhere in the comments, it was stated that men have more sexual desires than women and that it justified polygamy, and that men and women are somehow structured differently with regard to their emotional/physical needs, he frowned and said:

with all respect, these may sound like excuses for men to behave in a certain way, when societies explicitly state such facts; truth is, it’s not just an extra burden for women to carry, it’s also a reason for men to slack around and not learn to control whatever desires they might have, which will hinder their evolution, which I think is a bad thing, because men, just like women are capable of evolving and I think it’s great injustice for both genders to be denied such a right by claiming they have such privileges!”*

So, would do you have to say about that people!!

* that quote is not 100% accurate; I might have dropped or added a few words due to some memory impairment from my end; however, I would like to think that I did convey the meaning intended by good ol’M


LouLou said...

"When I mentioned that somewhere in the comments, it was stated that men have more sexual desires than women and that it justified polygamy,"

I always thought that argument was retarded.

1) Sex drive is an individual thing. A lot of emotional factors and things to do with your general health amd lifestyle affect it. It may even be hereditary.

Some men have a higher sex drive than some women. And some women have a higher sex drive than some men. Gender has nothing to do with it.

When married women get together and talk the no.1 complaint is often that their husbands don't want to have as much sex as they do. I haven't yet heard a woman complain that her husband wants to have too much sex!

2) Marriage is not just about sex. It's love and companionship and children and bills and in-laws and a whole lot of things that last a whole lifetime.

To suggest that something which has the potential to impact so many lives should be undertaken simply to satisfy one person's lust is just laughable.

3) It's very insulting to men because basically it means they're animals who can't control themselves and really shouldn't be allowed out on their own.

Your professor has much more patience than me.

Sorry but I have very low tolerance for this sort of drivel.

insomniac said...


i was never a big fan of that argument either, and usually i just listen and refrain from commenting because i have a strong belief that it would be a complete waste of breath!

i think marriage is all the things you said and more... i don't know what exactly but i think it's relative to the couple and too many other factors to actually list... the fact that people screw it up with labels and false justifications is not laughable at all to me, perhaps because i lived the tragedy myself!!

your remark on it being insulting to men is exactly what i had in mind and what my prof wanted to say at some point of the conversation! such theories allow men to be animals tho!

my professor is a great man! and of course it takes way more patience than what the two of us might be able to show to keep your cool while hearing such arguments and more for a living and try to deliver your message to different people from different cultural groups! this is why not all people teach and not all teachers are good!!

ur always welcomed here, so no need to explain :)))

Anonymous said...

may i hug your professor?

--sarah gipoflip

insomniac said...


Adam said...

Men as a whole remain a bunch of flawed, panicky, confused, and generally retarded animals.
any given man will have any of a million possible reasons for his actions, all as unique as a hurtful and insensitive snowflake.

So yeah! loss of control is why excuses are made.
But it is never justified.

insomniac said...


first of all, welcome back!

second of all, i think ur either giving men an excuse to behave in a certain way (animal like, that is), or u just denied them the right to evolve into more sophisticated beings!!

which one did u have in mind?

Adam said...

giving men the excuse tb3an!

I'm nothing if not biased =)

insomniac said...

well, it was a trick question :p

bu giving men such excuses, you denied them the right to evolve!

Adam said...