November 3, 2008

A person of habit… I am certainly not!


Yesterday before I dosed off a thought haunted me. I was secretly admiring my sister for maintaining her dental care while I tend to skip it when I’m too lazy to get out of bed! I mean between my sister and me, she’s definitely the lazy one, but not when it comes to remembering she had not brushed her teeth before going to bed. So, I decided to find at least one single thing I do on daily basis for more than three weeks in a row. NONE!!! Oh except for my Pepsi addiction, not my most glorious moment finding that out now, but I can reverse that for the sake of the argument!

I am not sure if it a good thing that I am not a person of habit generally speaking, because sometimes a few habits are good for us, like my sister’s good habit. It hit me that I have been hiding behind the motto “ the more I know about something, the less I wanna know about it”*! That arrogant statement has managed to enhance my short attention span and made it a valid excuse to let go of things (and sometimes people) too soon, not that I have any regrets (as arrogant as it sounds).

That was when the Art Therapist’s words echoed in my head “You’re lost, find you. Find something you’re passionate about, and do it, you’ll feel different”. Right now, I have no idea what it could possibly be, and I am not even that eager finding out because I have a strong conviction that I will end up bored in such a short time. I know it’s not passion that I lack; maintaining it is rather the trick.

My wall of shame has a variety of things I attempted to learn which I never followed through! It’s such an accomplishment that I have managed to maintain a blog for over a year now! Actually, I think I’m losing that passion too; I keep writing things and erasing them, I no longer like the sound of my words. The only reason I am still holding on to this blog is because it’s the only mirror I have to my thoughts that I’m afraid I’d get even more lost without it.


* A quote said by Winona Ryder in “How to Make an American Quilt”. The quote is not necessarily accurate, but I related it to it the moment I heard it YEARS ago.

6 comments:

gjoe said...

Neither am I! I am suffering (mildly though) from it. My dental care is almost zero, my facial care is very inconsistent, and I can't be interested in anything for too long enough.

The only thing I do on daily basis is prayers, and I don't always do it as good as I should though!

The.I.inside said...

although I think a person of habit is a very dull one but like you i admire his/her persistence, I find it amazing how they just don't get bored with it all.
I just love that quote never heard it before maybe I'll start using it from now on, I personally don't think it's arrogant at all, coming from the person who's been labeled arrogant since she's 10. LOL
and Please don't ever delete that blog, I log on everyday to see if YOU posted something new, among all the blogs I follow you are the main one

Deeeeeee said...

I'm glad your sister brushes her teeth :)

insomniac said...

gjoe,

amen!! don't get me started about my facial care!! for someone who is supposedly grateful for her sensitive skin, i should totally be taking better care of it :(


i,

yeah my defense phrase for not being persistent is "habits and hobbies are for dull people" i am not proud to say i have exclusive copy rights to that phrase which i realized lately that it's such a condescending phrase and only conveys my own shallowness...

so ur labeled arrogant? nice! i mean people call me that all the time, even when they know me better, they sugar coat it by saying "you have a tendency to be arrogant"... not that it matters :))

ohhh, it is so sweet of you that you asked me not to delete the blog, don't worry i won't... as heartless as i can be, i don't think i have it in me to delete this one, it's become a piece of me, strangely!


D,

every one i know is glad, including me :)

Anonymous said...

I think that's part of being Gemini..you want to know a bit of everything , your restlessness doesn't allow you to settle on one thing..but you gotta take care of your hygiene :D

R

insomniac said...

i know it's partially a gemini thing and i don't really hate it much, but sometimes it gets irritating... like these days...

hygiene! talk about health kaman... i never maintained my vitamins during pregnancy, and i barely took the blood pressure meds except when i felt really sick... i never finished an anti-biotic course and most of the time doctors would end up putting me on intensive courses thru shots to overcome the lack of absorption... i could go on forever, and i never learn!