It’s just… pathetic!

Back in my school days, whenever I traveled abroad with my family, I used to buy those little pins with flags on them (I wonder where those are!!). They looked cute and I must say, something about a flag is just… captivating, like it holds the entire culture of a country in it!

A few years later, when I joined a Canadian college, I used to have the Canadian flag on my backpack, until my dad saw it and gave me a long lecture about belonging to no country other than mine. He went on and on about how people in the states put their country’s flag right outside their doors and that I do not have to do the same, but neither should I ever bear a different country’s flag.

Back then, he made sense even though I did not pin the Canadian flag to my backpack to represent anything more than just my admiration to the country I’ve visited. To avoid any futile arguments about my patriotic opinions, I just replaced that pin with another of my college’s badge, after all, that was the college I belonged to whether he liked it or not.

Oh, and I tried to find a cute little pin with Egypt’s flag, but I found none!

***
Around a year ago, one of the managers in the Kuwaiti company where I work decided he wanted a small sized Egyptian flag to put it on his desk back in Kuwait along with the rest of the flags of countries where the company has business. He sent me an email asking me if we had any at our Egypt branch, I said we didn’t, so he asked me to send for around ten small flags, for our office as well as the head office. Moreover, he also asked me to get a bigger flag similar to the size of the Kuwaiti flag he’d send, so that both would be hung in our company here in Egypt.

I did not find any of good enough quality to be measured against the other flags I’ve seen. I’ve been told I could go to Faggala and check a bigger variety or have one custom made, but I was too busy to do it then! I asked friends who work in governmental authorities about the ones they put on ministers’ desks or at the doors of ministry buildings, but no one gave me any useful information. Eventually, I gave up and lost interest and so have my boss.

***
I see Egyptian flags everywhere! With all sizes and all qualities, simply every freakin' where!!!

Seriously!!

The match, screw it, I mean, what is the point of winning a silly match? What kind of advancement are we as a country and its people achieving here? Will our educational systems be any better? Will we be doing a better job on containing the epidemic flu that is closing all our schools? Oh and about H1N1 flu, how come the Minister of Health (beroo7 Ommoh) did not have any useful announcements about crowd management!! Wala el gomhoor el reyady 3ando wa3y se7y kafy, ya sheikh bala waksa!!

***

I will say it and I will not care about how many people will resent me for it… I wish Egypt loses this match. I think we Egyptians need to realize that there are more important things we need to win other than a meaningless match. We need to develop better behaviors and attitudes in order to lead better lives, and honestly, I think winning this match will close our eyes even further to the fact that WE NEED TO BE BETTER IN OTHER THINGS!! Not to mention the traffic madness and the accidents that WILL happen like the last time Egypt won the stupid African cup!

Wel ahbal elly ba3et email saying that he’s happy we’re all uniting for this, yala roo7 egry el3ab be3eed!! Maho men khebetna!! We kaman we are emotional people, benetlam we ne unite fel kheiba, 3ady, heya awel marra ya3ne, bas sa3et el gadd, when our union is needed for something useful, we only throw charity parties for the cause but do nothing useful, so etwekes!! (he’s the same guy who urged his fellow Egyptians to show their compassion to the President for the loss of his grandchild, Alllah yer7amoh… 3ayel 7o2na, we monafeq keda we te7esso maloosh substance!!)

I am sorry fellow Egyptians and soccer fans, we do not deserve that kind of victory when we’re so oblivious of our failures in every other aspect of our social and cultural life, hell, in how we deal with one another!

***

I want to go to my dad and explain to him that I’d rather carry the Canadian flag than the Egyptian flag because I learned my most useful lessons during college from Canadian professors, not Egyptian ones. I want to sadly admit to him that the only reason I belong to this country is because he does. He’s the one who paid for my education, my health care, and every privilege and luxury I enjoyed, so I belong to him, and if it means I belong to this country for his sake, then I do.

I don’t hate Egypt; I love it… ok, it’s a classic love/hate relationship like Will calls it. Egypt is like the mother who constantly abuses and insults me and expects me to forever love her because it’s my duty. Egypt is like the mother who never showed sincere care or did anything of value contributing to my wellbeing and development, yet expects me to acknowledge her non-existing role in making me who I am!

Egypt is the mother I could never bring myself to love or honor simply because I refuse to be an abuse victim, yet my good upbringing prevents me from showing my dislike and discontentment to others. It’s because of my upbringing that I find myself speaking with pride whenever I am asked where I am from, although it was never Egypt who gave me reasons to be proud, it was always my father.

***

So tomorrow, I might go and buy that flag after all, regardless of the score of the match because to me, it was never about a silly match, it is about something more profound than that, something I still hope I could find and feel for this country because I can’t feel it for any other.