August 30, 2008
No, it’s not freakin’ ok!
A childhood friend of mine had a brain tumor right on the nerve feeding his right ear. He went to the states around three weeks ago and had the tumor removed, along with his hearing ability in the right ear. Now, he hears absolutely nothing if he sleeps on his left side, blocking his good ear. My friend is now recovering from the surgery and undergoing rehabilitation in order to deal with regaining his balance, since apparently it was not just hearing that he lost. I am grateful he recovered, but I can’t grasp the loss, and I am terrified the tumor would come back.
I’ve last seen my friend during my Luxor and Aswan trip. My friend turns 31 in September. My friend had two beautiful girls, and his wife has just given birth to the third while he was in the states having his surgery. My friend is a good husband and a great daddy.
My friend is a good guy. My friend used to help me carry my kids’ stroller on and off the boat in Aswan. My friend would hold my Beem and soothe him when he noticed I was too tired to walk carrying him. My friend is a good guy.
My dad told me about my friend a couple of hours before the x’s aunt came to visit the kids bearing his cheap gifts. I couldn’t return the toys because my kids were so thrilled, but I did return the clothes and I was too stiff about it, it almost felt like I was kicking her out as I did it.
I was thinking of my friend, and how his health and his time with his kids has been affected for good, while my x enjoys his health and the time he doesn’t bother spending with his kids getting to know them; how my x never really held Mocha and has no clue what Beem would want for his next birthday! How all that seems trivial when compared to how my friend loses touch with his surroundings if he sleeps on the wrong side!
Things like that are hard for me to grasp. Things like this shake my entire existence and make me beg for God’s mercy and beg to understand His wisdom.
حكمتك يا رب